the learning student

As I was having my ride back ( on HS car, thanks a lot HS). I begin to remember how it is a real blessing for me to know wonderful individuals like NH, HS and SA whom I have been given the opportunity to study with in college. Today, we just finished our presentation, hopefully when our group photos are up, I will upload them here. (Its the first time I wore a tie, lol). The presentation went well, our group leader yr is very meticulous, and put in so much grandeur into the the presentation, from buffet lunch, to the LT and his superb outlook. NH, did an amazing job answering the questions from the Industry mentors, and everyone look pro presenting.

I was watching Oprah some time back when Dr Randy Pausch delivered such an inspirational lecture, you can find it on youtube. He knew he had months to live back then because of his pancreatic cancer. He passed away on the 25th of July.

Perhaps one of the most important lesson that I learnt in that speech was how you can “work and play well” with others. I believe this is a very important aspect of learning. He stated three points, which I will elaborate from my own experience working with others

[1] Tell the truth

Live with Integrity. Just tell the truth. If it is bad say that it is bad – when being asked. SA, NH and HS are very honest people, really. It really hurts if you try to advice others using sarcasm or worst still indirectly – don’t undermine people’s intelligence. You’ll hurt people more than saying them honestly and directly. Don’t say something is good, if you think it is bad, you’ll damage friendships. And most importantly, don’t lie just to maintain a friendship – you will lose it.

[2] Apologize (Properly)

Dr Randy mentioned three important components of a sincere apology: (1) I’m Sorry (2) It was my fault (3) How do I make it right. The worst apology is one in which you force someone to accept it. “Hey, you are not forgiving me, why are you so petty”. Remember that an apology only benefits the one saying sorry. You’ve embarrassed the person, you’ve damaged his reputation, and you are asking to lighten that burden of guilt. Don’t expect someone to accept your apology, if you are not a forgiving person. How can such a person ever have the hope of divine forgiveness? If what he does is far worst than what is done unto him? So I ay, be merciful, everyone makes mistakes, the best of people are those who live to rectify them.

[3] Wait and people will show the good side

Impatience is really a killer to any friendship. Don’t frown at the face of a friend – a sure sign of arrogance, anti humility. Be graceful, don’t expect someone to immediately pick up the call, or reply an sms. Give him a day or two if it is not urgent. At times I do feel like throwing away my phone, it does feel uncomfortable when someone don’t reply to an sms, but then again, he may have forgotten. Arrange time to meet and talk or call, people like me don’t pick up the phone lol.

[4] Show Gratitude

Contrary to popular belief, people in the long run get sick with thank yous. It is better than without it of course, but words are not enough. Gratitude includes how you treat a person. You don’t spill poo or throw dirt at someone you are thankful to.